1. No one expects you to take a bath every day.
2. Your friends never expect you to pay for lunch, dinner or anything else for that matter.
3. When it’s raining, you can lie around the house all day and never worry about being fired.
4. If it itches, you can reach it.
5. And, no matter what itches, no one is offended if you scratch it in public.
6. It doesn’t bother you if your favorite television show is a rerun.
7. You can wear a fur coat and no one thinks you’re insensitive.
8. April 15 means nothing to you.
9. People at drive-through windows never charge you for treats.
10. Your friends don’t think less of you for passing gas.
11. A rawhide bone can entertain you for hours.
12. No one gets mad if you fall asleep while they’re talking.
13. As an adult, it’s OK if you haven’t “amounted to anything” except being a dog.
14. The older you get, the more people respect you.
15. You can sleep late every day.
16. If you grow hair in weird places, no one notices.
17. You never get in trouble for putting your head in a stranger’s lap.
18. There’s no such thing as bad food.
19. You don’t have to worry about good table manners.
20. Someone else combs your hair.
21. People think you’re normal if you stick your head out the window to feel the wind in your hair.
22. You’re always excited to see the same old people.
23. Having big feet is considered an asset.
24. If you gain weight, it’s someone else’s fault.
25. Everything smells good to you.26. A garbage can is a fast-food stop.
27. No one tells you to wipe your nose because it’s wet.
28. No matter where you live, you own the place.
29. Your mate never complains because you whine.
30. Puppy love can last.